Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Christians and the Service Industry

I'm a pretty easy going guy, but one thing that almost always annoys me to the point of mutually assured destruction is a rude Christian. That phrase should be an oxymoron. But sadly, I know a lot of believers who are bursting with negativity and complaints and flat-out rudeness, especially when it comes to people in the service industry: restaurant wait staff, supermarket employees, retail sales clerks. Few things make me angrier.

(Of course, this is likely because I'm not much better. There are too many times when I've shown annoyance at a server because my food came too slow or my order wasn't right. But I try not to. I really try.)

I bring this up because last week the Internet Monk called attention to another blogger's unbelievable story about Christians in a restaurant.

Here's part of it. Read the full account at Tom Steagald's blog.

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A group of six church-goers came in last night after their evening services and sat down, not in her area but in another server's. When the girl came to greet them and take their drink order, one of them said, "We want to tell you up front that we will not be tipping you tonight because..."

Are you ready?

"...we do not believe in people working on Sunday."

The girl was taken full-aback, stammered out something that sounded like "I wouldn't have to work on Sunday if so many church people didn't come in," or some such. She was furious. So was the manager of the restaurant whom she summoned to deal with them. I think he should have tossed the people out on their...uh...Bibles. To his credit, and demonstrating something like agape all around, he did say to them, "Well, we don't believe in making our people work for nothing, so I will be serving you tonight." And he did. God bless him.

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Wow. I'm seriously impressed by the manager's response, which was far more gracious and Christlike than the actions of the Christians. I'm saddened by them. They thought they were being honest, I'm sure, by telling the server beforehand that she wouldn't get a tip. But they didn't seem to realize that they were the primary reason people worked on Sunday -- because they were there to eat.

Read all of Tom Steagald's original post here. For plenty more of these kinds of stories, check out the Internet Monk thread here.

And while you're at it, read this intriguing article from USA Today. It's about how CEOs have discovered they can tell a lot about an employee's character by how that person treats a waiter.

It contains this quote, which comes from a book called Swanson's Unwritten Rules of Management: "A person who is nice to you but rude to the waiter, or to others, is not a nice person."

Not a nice person.

I think it's safe to say you can tell a lot about a person's faith by how they treat those in the service industry. Those who treat servers poorly don't seem to understand that, as Christians, WE are supposed to be going about the business of serving.

Do you dole out to others the same grace you have received? How have you treated people today?

17 comments:

shueytexas said...

Here's my first snark-free comment on your blog: When I begin to doubt myself or question my [character, abilities, inherent worth], I sometimes remind myself that I am unfailingly polite to the people you discuss in this post. Rudeness to strangers, especially those in service positions, grates on me.

WV: "elacro" - Spanish slang for a particularly nimble or quick person.

serenity said...

Awesome post. My sister was a waitress, and I've never so much as grimaced at one since then. Every now and then, they do their job with so little effort and common thoughtfulness that I don't feel they need any extra tip beyond the basic. But I am so easy to please in a restaurant that anyone who doesn't please me has all but thrown a tray of food at my face. I cannot believe those Christians did that. What were they thinking eating in a restaurant if that is what they believe? That is so unacceptable, I'm molting.

clarissa h said...

I try my best to treat people as I wish to be treated. If for some reason I acted in a way that did not align my beliefs, I would apologize for whatever behavior it was. Sometimes I dislike to think that most of the hypocritical people I know are really people who call themselves Christians. Its sounds really stupid, but it is one of the primary reasons I stopped attending church and am unable to find a church that suits me....I know we are all sinners and no one is perfect but still.....

Matt said...

Great post and something we should all pay attention to, glad you brought the subject matter up.

I waited tables for a year and 9 months and I said at that time, and I've said since, that had I not already been a follower of Christ I probably would not have become one due to the actions of the after-church crowd; Sunday Lunch and Dinner and even Wednesday nights. Servers work the hardest and make the least and deal with the rudest customers.

My worst experience was a Wednesday night couple who left a "witness track" that looked like a $10 bill with a message inside about how this fake $10 tip was better than any cash that I could be left as a tip because this "tip" could lead to my eternal salvation. I wanted to run into the parking lot to tell the people how much more damage they were doing than good. Instead I wadded up the trac, probably said some not nice words, and kept going...

There were probably four or five of us working in that restaraunt at the time who were Christians and we had a hard enough time living as witnesses without having to deal with the church crowds.

To this day if I go out to eat and it's obvious we're a "church" group I'm doubly nice and patient with the servers and tip more than what I normally would, sometimes more if I see others not leaving enough... I think that would be a good practice for all. If you don't want to tip go somewhere you don't have to.

jasonS said...

This drives me crazy too--and that story is ridiculously sad. It shows the selfishness, religiosity, and blindness of a lot of Christians who are more interested in rules than showing Jesus. Okay, okay, don't get me started!

Jason said...

That sounds like a couple of Christian college graduates who have never read the book of John.

Jason Boyett said...

@Jason (the last one, because there are suddenly a lot of Jasons around here):

I'm not following. Why do you suppose they are a) graduates of Christian colleges and b) non-familiar with the book of John?

I appreciate the comment, but I don't understand it. Please explain.

Felicity said...

You're speaking my blog language here, Jason; I love talking about virtue and how it separates the sheep from the goats! : )I love the idea of the CEO judging people by the way they treat waitstaff.

I was a waitress for a few years and now I take pride in being one of the best customers EVER. It is my goal anyway.

On a side note, I have a friend who says, "Before we had kids, we tipped to say thank you. Now that we have kids, we tip to say I'm sorry!"

Felicity said...

Now I feel like my comment sounded judgmental ... I should clarify that I do know some otherwise fabulous people that tend to be rude to servers at restaurants. I've never pointed this out to them, and I wonder if I would if they would reform? I mean, it could be an oversight? Something they never really thought about?

Pam said...

It is a sad fact of life that Christians are known as the worst customers and/or tippers....

By the way- if you're eating lunch with me and you're rude to the waitress- I will call you down- just so you know.... hmmmmm... wonder if there's any correlation between that and my lack of dinner invites? Anyhoo....

@Felicity: "Before we had kids, we tipped to say thank you. Now that we have kids, we tip to say I'm sorry!" That is hilarious and so true for me too!

tmamone said...

Good post, although there is one thing I don't get. If those six church-goers didn't believe in working on Sundays, why did they even go to the restaurant? I mean, they would only be making the waiters work more.

JenW said...

Love ya for posting this, Jason. Waited tables througout college and can't tell you how much everyone dreaded the "church crowd". Some of my worst experiences were with the people that came in on Sunday mornings and it breaks my heart. I mentioned it to my mom recently when we went to eat after church and she was shocked. I think she left an especially generous tip that day:) Thanks again.

Kim said...

I was really surprised one evening when a mentor of ours stopped our waiter and asked him how we could pray for him. He opened up in an amazing way, and even let us pray for him right then.

When I feel courageous (just being honest), I do this myself. I'm always amazed at the openness of most people even in the very unChristian area of Seattle and Portland. I've been asked to pray for healing, for direction in life, and for family issues. I dare you!

Try it! It's scary because you never know how someone will react. But the worst response I've received was basically "I'm fine. Thanks." The best was, "I really needed this. It's been a really tough day."

And yes, we always tip well.

Jason said...
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Jason said...
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Jason said...

I posted those comments with WAY too many typos, so let me redo that.

By reading the book of John, I meant that they didn't understand that Jesus loved everybody, even people who worked on the Sabbath, not just people who were "perfect."

I didn't literally mean college. (I should have clarified, my bad) I meant people who try to prove points to non-believers, but just end up sounding like jerks.

Jason (not Boyett) said...

I realize I'm late commenting here but I just saw this from your recap post. I'm with you on this and continue to be baffled by Christians acting this way. I get especially infuriated by crappy tipping. I don't have a ton of cash, but if I go out to eat, I pray at my table and I tip the heck out of the waiter/waitress. We're representing Christ, the most sacrificial giver ever, why would we tip like jerks? Baffling.